I love this picture of Tova.  It epitomizes his love of being in the thick of it… always!  Wherever there is life and adventure, that’s where he is.

I’ve never met a dog who was more about people and being a part of the family and its comings and goings than Tova. He is his happiest and most complete being where we are.

He’s spoiled me when it comes to most other dogs.  He is loving, playful and eager attentiveness.

I’m always grateful that we met and that he choose us.

I never delighted much in contemplating commas and colons, or in spelling or measuring syllables; but now…if I attempt to look at these little objects, I find my imagination, in spite of all my exertions, roaming in the Milky Way, among the nebulae, those mighty orbs, and stupendous orbits of suns, planets, satellites, and comets, which compose the incomprehensible universe; and if I do not sink into nothing in my own estimation, I feel an irresistible impulse to fall on my knees, in adoration of the power that moves, the wisdom that directs, the benevolence that sanctifies this wonderful whole.

–John Adams

I have so many thoughts in my head and I’m not certain how to work them into coherent conversation. (I’m sure you’ve had a sense of that recently reading my blog.) Much of what’s traveling through my head is completely opposite to the other. One moment will be filled with laughter, delight and beauty and the next with anxiety, uncertainty, fear and helpless hopelessness.

The last couple of times I walked outside snapping photos - I noticed nature is a reflection of my mind. There is beauty, endless heart, soul and mind filling beauty. But it isn’t there alone. It lives right next to those things that are faded, damaged, ugly, dying or even dead. Framing a picture in my mind, I wonder… should I crop out the portions that aren’t lovely? Do I filter out the things out of my vision that don’t bloom and dazzle? What is the benefit of seeing and capturing the things that don’t inspire, or worse cloud and dampen, our spirits? Is there one at all?

Paul & I watched Volver this evening. I haven’t been a huge fan of Pedro Almodóvar in the past, but I enjoyed this story. The movie told a story about the beauty and horror that happens and exists in our lives. Although, I confess it is by no means a settled subject for me… the message that I heard in this film began to approach an answer to my question. There can be a purpose in seeing and acknowledging the horribleness that sometimes lives right next to the beauty in our lives. It’s the irreplaceable, raw, and healing power of community, connection, friendship, and love that is found in shared lives… all of it.

Case in point, one of my dear friends is going through a dark, difficult and unexplainable time. She feels guilty for burdening Paul & I. Last night I sent her a quote I’d read recently by Helen Keller: “Walking with a friend in the dark is better than walking alone in the light.” I knew I meant it, but now I understand a little more why.

Carpe diem! Rejoice while you are alive; enjoy the day; live life to the fullest; make the most of what you have. It is later than you think.

–Horace

Wind was let outside to play today. The birds have hunkered down wherever they do their hunkering. The animals have curled up inside waiting. Howling over the treetops and skipping across the top of the waters, his rough-housing has knocked down a large branches. Like prankster kids ringing a doorbell and then hiding out of sight, the wind pushes on the sides of our house until it protests loudly with creaks and then quickly moves on. The thing about when Wind is out to play, no one but God has the ability to call him back inside. Wind is the big kid, the bully, on the block. No one else dares stand up to him. We all know it’s a waste of effort and time.

There are days, like today, that I feel the same about life. There are events that have such gusts of power that to stand in the face of them seems foolish. But the alternative? To allow myself be thrown about and down, that seems worse than foolish. Today I decided I will be foolish rather than despairing… hanging on until God calls him back inside.

…to find out that people are glad to have crossed paths with me. In the last week or so, I’ve discovered that:

• The beautiful and effervescent Gwen Bell included me in the list of people she was grateful for on her birthday. I can’t tell you - it was like getting a birthday present of my own to read that. Thank you Gwen. Happy Birthday — here’s to an amazing new year for you. I’m privileged to be along for the ride.
• I was awarded the Arte y Pico award… not once, but twice. First, by Chey of Maritime Gardener who graciously awarded it to me “for her beautiful photography and thoughtful positive reflections on life.” And second by Judy at CoffeeJitters who equally humbled me by saying: “For Janece at No Ordinary Moment because she takes my breath away with her gorgeous photos of the Pacific Northwest” What is the Arte y Pico award? From the award creator:
• “What is the meaning of the expression: And basically, ironically, it translates into a wonderful phrase in Mexico, “lo maximo.” LOL! It will never find its counterpart in English, but if it HAD to, it would be something like, Wow. The Best Art. Over the top.”
• My beloved Natalie at Chicken Blog awarded me and my two favorite people on the planet (Paul & Amira) with the “Brillante Weblog Premio“.
• Almost two months ago, Tarie gave me the Blogging Friends Forever Gold Card.

Participating in the blogosphere has been such an intensely rewarding endeavor.  Where else would I have found friends, mentors, inspirations and fellow dreamers?

Winfield Designs, seen at the Kitsap Arts & Crafts Festival.

Okay, not trouble exactly.  But for those of you who thought his blog was going to forever molder in the back corner of the blogosphere… good news!

He’s back!

One of my weaknesses is that I’ve been told time and again, plainly and simply, what the combination is to open a lock and yet I stubbornly try to use a different combination that I find more to my liking. To none of our surprise, my combination doesn’t open the lock. No matter how many times I try it, no matter with how much persistence or effort… it just doesn’t work. Then, I get angry and ask - why won’t the combination I want to use work? It’s embarrassing to admit, but that’s exactly what I do.

I’m knee-deep in The Wire… so the first thing that comes to mind is: “This shit is simple. You feel me?”

It. is. simple. Use the combination that opens the lock.

The other thing that really grabbed me while watching the John Adams series last night was in the extras. There was a mini-documentary on David McCullough, the author of the biography on John Adams that the mini-series was based on. It’s a deceptively small thing, but powerful. He said anything you want to be is only possible in the doing of it. If you want to write, you must write. If you want to paint, then you paint. You excel through the doing, not just knowing and learning.

Simple.

It’s spun me around and I’m looking at my day differently. Those things I want to be, I’ve put them in my schedule to do today.

Paul & I finished HBO’s mini-series on John Adams last night. The series was based off David McCullough’s Pulitzer Prize winning book. The final part had me wracked by tears.  When John Adam’s wife Abigail dies, he makes a comment to his son:

I cannot believe that God created a creature such as she only to walk, live and die on this earth.

I don’t know if that was pulled from an actual historical statement or from the mind of David McCullough or the screenplay authors.  Regardless, it expresses nearly perfectly the anguish and anger I have with death.

I’m not sure why I bring this up or where I’m going with it.

I don’t have a working philosophy or theology around death.  As I get older, I think how we live arises out of what we believe and how we deal with death… of our loved ones and the inevitability of our own.  So while it isn’t a topic that I want to dwell in, it’s one I need to spend a little time with.

In the car, Paul & I were talking about where we can go to eat so that we don’t have to cook but that won’t make our sweet girl sick. In the middle of the conversation Paul stops and says:

“Amira, why do you have to be allergic to wheat?”

To which Amira replies:

“Um, I’m just looking at the trees!”

We took a walk a few days back with Amira through our neighborhood. I never realized how many dogs lived around here. I think we counted something like 20 dogs! And of course, they let everyone know we were coming. There’s no sneaking around unnoticed in this neighborhood!

I grabbed my camera and snapped a few photos. The above being one of them. But mostly, I just had a magical time walking, playing, laughing and delighting in Paul and Amira!

How DID I get so lucky?  And whatever I did, let me know so that I can do it again!!

Police say a trail of pillows and backpacks led to two sleeping men who were arrested after a department store break-in.

…police followed a trail of cardboard and items from storage containers in a locked area behind the store that led to the two men. One was sleeping in a stolen hammock and the other on a pile of stolen pillows.

Anyone have a gluten and egg free chocolate cake recipe that’s yum? Am I asking for the impossible?

Amira’s 4th birthday is in September. I’m starting the search now for a recipe that will be deserving of my girl — but not hurt her afterwards.

The above cupcake: Namaste Chocolate Cake (requires eggs ) and Pamela’s Gluten Free Dark Chocolate Sour Cream Frosting… tasty if you have no problem with eggs.